Rat Tail...

The other night, I was talking to my roommates about yucky hairstyles that guys sometimes try out. Such as: the mullet, mutton chops, comb-overs...

Whitney mentioned rat tails, and I was immediately overcome with the giggles because, because, because, because, BECAAAAUSE!

Story time!

A couple of days after finishing up my Bachelors Degree at Utah State University, and before I sold my soul to graduate school (also at USU), I flew on up to Alaska with a couple of friends to work up there for the summer and have myself an Alaskan Adventure!

I could tell you all sorts of stories, but then this post would run on for days, and that might wax boring unto you, so I'll get back to my point.

Alaska is a beautiful place, people. And I worked at a lovely hotel just outside of Denali National Park.

Most of the other employees there were what can best be described as "seasonal workers." These are nomadic people who travel around to different locations, often state or national parks, each and every season. To work. It's, like, their way of life. And it must be said that seasonal workers are kind of a breed of their own. That's not to say that they aren't fun, lovely people; we made friends with lots of them. Let's just say it was an eye-opening experience for a few gals who grew up in small-town, Utah.

There was lots of drinking and partying, and our new friends quickly discovered that me and my crew weren't the drinking, partying type.

Welp, there was this one fellow whose name completely evades me, but that's okay, because what's important is that he had a rat tail, and Rat Tail is kind of what we called him. (Was his name Bill?)

Anyhoo, Rat Tail totally gave me the heebie-jeebies, but that didn't stop him from sitting across from me and my crew at meal time. (Isn't that part of what makes the really creepy guys ultra creepy? Their persistence and such?) I had a sneaking suspicion that Rat Tail wanted to be the one to get The Mormon Girls to go to the bar and...whatever.

Ick.

One day during breakfast, my friend Jamie was telling me that her laptop was having issues, and Rat Tail overheard her and insisted on helping her fix it.

So. After work, he showed up at our place and got to work. Jamie (dang her!) promptly went next door to avoid Rat Tail and his creepy self and left me to babysit him while she chatted merrily with our neighbors! (She asked me why I didn't join her, and I told her, "Because! I didn't want to give him free-reign to our place! I wouldn't put it past him to find and sniff our panties!")

Yeah. That's the kind of creepy vibe I got from this guy.

Anyway, after about a week or so of trying to get us to the bar ("You don't even have to drink! It'll just be fun for you to see how we all unwind!"), he kind of gave up and moved on to pester another girl.

Another girl who kind of liked him and his creepy ways. (He got her pregnant.)

Okay, so after maybe 3 or 4 weeks there in Healy, Alaska, we noticed Rat Tail was missing during breakfast. Then the story got out.

The story that he was wanted for child porn (ICK! Worst crime ever!!!), and that he was on the lam, working in Alaska because he figured he could run away from the United States government that way.

Because Alaska isn't part of the United States, apparently?

Geez, guy! Clearly, so very many things are wrong with this fella. SO! MANY! THINGS! The silly rat tail was only the beginning...

And here are a couple of pictures,
since you stuck around through the story.
No, none of them are of the infamous Rat Tail.
You're welcome.

Denali
aka Mt. McKinley
standing at 20,320 feet above sea level.

From our Kenai Fjord tour
off the Kenai Peninsula.
Jamie and I got incredibly boat sick,
but that's another story for another time...