We fought, just like any normal family, see...
At times, my brothers and I would say mean things about each other. Face to face.
That's not to say that our home was one of chaos and hatred. No, we loved each other, but didn't always like each other, if you know what I mean.
On the occasions that things felt less than peaceful, Mom fought back.
With love.
In fact, that's what she called our punishment: "You two are withloved!" This meant that the kids in question had to sit by each other on the loveseat until we liked each other again.
This usually felt a bit cruel and unusual, if you catch my drift. WHY would Mom inflict us with each other for (sometimes) ridiculously long periods of time when she knew full-well that we, in fact, didn't like each other?
I already know that I'll be using this with my own crew of kids one day.
If they ever fight, I mean...
Another something Mom did when her children had heated words is this: for every mean thing we said about the dumb kid who, for reasons unknown, God gave us as a sibling, we would have to say two nice things about that kid. Got that ratio? 1 mean:2 nice.
Torturous. Seriously, when you think you hate someone, it's really hard to come up with something stupendous about them. And Mom wanted TWO stupendous things. Not an easy task, just so you know...
Now that we're all grown up, we think only the best of one another. Isn't that you and your siblings too? -Okay, not always, but try this one on for size: You are your own worst critic, don't you think? I actually have a pretty healthy self-esteem. But man, sometimes life happens fast and I feel little and insignificant, and when lots of crap flies, it's sometimes hard to find the good in one's self.
There there, little ego.
So. In light of the aforementioned "punishments" a loving mother inflicted on her chillins, I'm going to inflict the same punishment on myself.
I am going to come up with two good things about me. FOR ALL THE WORLD TO READ.
Are you ready?
Are you ready?
#1. I've never made a bad apple pie. I'm being completely honest here, folks. Alright, sometimes I've made ugly apple pies, but DANG, they always taste good. REAL good. The recipe is found right...here.
#2. I can change at darn-near lightning speed. Seriously, I'm quick at changing wardrobe. Out of church clothes (tights included!) and into jammies (booties included!) in no time flat. Okay, so I've never technically timed myself, but I'm faster than you, I'm sure of it. Here's a comparison; I'm the female equivalent of Clark Kent/Superman (minus all those special powers, I mean). Think about it, though; you've seen it in the movies and cartoons: CK enters a phonebooth, and before you've had time to blink, Superman emerges! I'm that fast, people.
What about you? What are your mad skills? It's definitely something worth thinking about...
6 comments:
I never remember as a child being withloved. I was the peacekeeper (see also; the weiner) of the family. whenever there was contention, I usually hid myself away in the toy closet. I would like to lay claim to this as one of my talents. over the years, I've learned to fight back a bit more, but I still try to keep a bipartisan realtionship in all things, familial and otherwise.
also, I make a mean sandwich. even before I became an authentic sandwich artist, I was practicing my craft. funny, I don't really go too far-fetched with my recipe (unless the sandwich in question is my own, in which case I've been known to make Nacho Sandwiches). my special ingredient; love. that, and Miracle Whip.
This is a stupid post! - No! You are!!
Uh-oh looks like we get to sit next to each other on the loveseat.
See this is my diabolic genius - it's my intention to sit next to you; because I know that it is the most tortuous thing for you. I'm getting sadistic satisfaction out of making things uncomfortable.
In addition I have two fall back nice "compliments" - Henry has a nice personality. [False - he has NO personality; I'm just saying this because the authority figure demands some ratio to be fulfilled. One down - one to go.]
- Henry never makes a bad apple pie. [False - it'd be damn near impossible for a three year-old to mess up an apple pie. You can get two slices of bread - some pie filler and an apple put it in an Xpress269 and wallah!! Apple pie.
So Gina I hope you enjoy the next two hours we sit next to each other on the loveseat. Because I had beans and fatty pork - and I'm sharing the love.
Oh - two things I excel at? Any and Everything. Bump. Set. Spike.
Eskimo Bob made me laugh. But not as much as your post. I'd love to taste one of your delicious pies...someday :)
cookies.
and i can read pretty fast.
I rarely got that punishment. Actually, I think you could just call it the Vance and Gina punishment. Brent never got it because he's a wuss and the worst fight he's been in was with a stubborn box of donuts.
well, heck, Aaron. I already confessed I am the weiner of the family, what else do you want? and in my defense, that box of donuts was particularly stubborn. and I believe they were actually crullers.
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